Tribute to a wonderful husband and father

  The community thanksgiving service meant a lot to Mike.  He believed it was important for the churches in this community to come together in corporate worship to give praise and thanksgiving to God.  We may come from different denominations and have different traditions but we all have the same God.  We all worship the God who created all living things, brought the Israelites out of Egypt, gave David strength to battle a giant, gave Joshua strength to march around the walls of Jericho, and sent His own son to us as a baby so that he could walk among us and one day die for our sins so that we could be forgiven and live in eternity with Him.

Mike was a wonderful husband and father.  We met in 1993 and got married in 1995.  He was a perfect mate for me.  He always put God first and family second.  That is the way it should be so that he could lead our family as the spiritual head of the household.  He also always took out the trash, changed the litter box, kept the car full of gas, helped clean the house and helped to cook.  He was a great example for Hannah and she definitely had him wrapped around her little finger from the moment she was born.  We did everything together as a family and those memories are what we now hold on to forever.  We just celebrated our 20th wedding anniversary in August and we had considered renewing our vows on the 25th anniversary.  He loved football and was an avid Dallas Cowboy fan.  He would have been so happy today that they finally won a game after a much too long losing streak.

Mike celebrated this time of year because he loved to give God praises for all the blessings that we have.  Mike loved to preach and teach others about the Word of God.  As his wife, I often saw him experience sleepless nights before delivering a hard message that God had given him.  I always would pray for him during the service that God would be with him and deliver the words that he should say.  Some Sundays he would come home after the morning service physically and emotionally exhausted because he had poured himself out to so many through the message or just through talking with someone afterwards.  He was always ready to go back on Sunday night and teach through a book of the Bible.  It was truly his passion to teach others how to break down a verse or chapter, understand the context but ask questions so that they could apply it.  He was teaching through the book of Philippians and he would always put his Bible marker where he left off.  His marker was left in Philippians chapter 3 and 4.  Philippians 4:13 was a verse that Mike held close and one that became a favorite of our family, “I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.”

It didn’t matter what age someone was because he always found a way to deliver the message to them.  He loved the little children and sharing the gospel with them throughout the year but especially during Vacation Bible School.  He always created his own hype with them and they loved to see Pastor Mike around the church.  He loved working with our youth and always supported them of their ideas and helped them when they had hard questions.  He loved missions so much and always made sure that the church had a mission focus, which wasn’t hard to do because there are so many mission minded people at Meadow Heights.  Mike always tried to go on all the mission trips.  While he was gifted in preaching and teaching, he may have not always known how to do construction but he was always willing to learn and he learned so much from our talented construction crews.  Whether it was putting up drywall, building a deck ramp, clearing out overgrown brush, or just helping a church member save a level that was about to drop from his hands.  He loved to be with his church members and lookedfor “God things” as he called them.  These were special encounters that God places in your life at any moment.  No matter where you are, you should always keep in mind those people that cross your path each day that may need a word of encouragement, a hug or just have someone listen to their need.    They experienced them as they were working at the mission sites and even when they took an afternoon to go sight seeing.  One of the most meaningful times was when they went to help rebuild in New York after hurricane Sandy.  They were on a beach on a sight seeing trip and ministered to someone who had experienced a loss of a family member.  He also had an opportunity to pray with someone in the subway of New York with a lady who just needed someone to pray for her. These are the “God things” that Mike wanted each mission team member to see and anticipate.

He also loved seniors and truly enjoyed getting together with our senior adults with their luncheons and outings when he could.  He loved talking with the senior adults and sharing with the godly Sunday school teachers that this church has.  

When we made the decision to homeschool Hannah a couple years ago, I asked Mike if he was going to mind having her with him 3 days a week.  We had worked it out with my office to allow me to work from home one day and he would have her the other 3.  We both were off on Friday which made for a perfect family day.  He never minded and I think it was a special time for him to share his day with her and allowed her to see what was going on in the community as well.

On October 7, 2015, our lives changed permanently forever.  He went to sleep and woke up in heaven.  God decided that Mike had completed his mission on earth.  The grief we experience right now is unpredicatable, sometimes solitary, and one that can’t be healed in a moment or month but takes time.  Sometimes it is like the ocean, we experience the ebbs and flows.  One moment, you remember happy times and other moments you experience the waves of sorrow.  It is almost like a fog where you can’t see the end of the road.  Loss can open your eyes to see the same world from a different viewpoint, with new scenery.  It is a journey of life where things that may have mattered before suddenly become miniscule and unimportant.  

As we celebrate this community thanksgiving service, I have definitely seen a community in my life.  People have surrounded me when I needed it most and I know that I could not have made it without the my church and this community.  For that I give praise and thanksgiving to God.  I have always believed that God brings you through trials of life so that he may build the testimony in your life and so that you can be there for someone else that is going through the same things.  For me, it is important to continue Mike’s legacy because he never would have realized the impact that he had on so many.

Today, I received a card from a loving church member.  I have received so many and each one have the perfect words for what I need right at that moment.  Today, those words were:

This time in your life isn’t easy, but you’re walking through it with such a clear reflection of God’s grace.  Still there must be days that are harder than others, when you feel like this is more than you can handle.  In those moments your heart is in a perfect place – a place where God’s strength will be there to give you everything you need.

My identity as a pastor’s wife may be completed but I am still a mother to a wonderful and strong daughter that has her father’s strength and soft heart for others.  Most importantly, my identity now is still as a child of God and I know that I will be with Mike again one day, because of my faith in Christ.  Mike and I had the honor in visiting Israel in the year 2000.  As we walked along a mountainside in Jericho, it was a dry and rocky path that went straight down and had no rails to protect us on the path.  Psalm 121 became very alive for us that day.

 

Thank you all again for being here and may God be with you as you leave this place.  Be a light to this world that sometimes seems like darkness.  Show love to everyone that crosses your path.  Look for the “God things” that come into your life.  This is Mike’s legacy for us for us to live the life God has for us until God calls each of us to be home with Him.

 

Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving is approaching and then the holidays will be in full swing.  It brings a different feeling to Hannah and I this year.  I want the time to slow down so that I have more time to prepare for the emotions that it is going to bring, but time keeps moving. 

Thanksgiving is a special time of year when we take time to be thankful.  For some of us, the list can be endless.  We can go on and on listing all the blessings that we see.  For others, it may be a struggle with finding things for which to be thankful.  Circumstances in life may have caused you to avoid being thankful because you aren’t sure why you should be thankful for those circumstances.

God’s word says:  “He who offers a sacrifice of thanksgiving honors me.” - Psalm 50:23

Sometimes it takes a sacrifice on our part to be thankful.  Through the tears or through the fears, God wants us to be thankful.  It seems like I shed some tears almost every day.  I miss the man God gave me 22 years ago but I am thankful for each and every day that God gave me with Mike.  I am thankful for the daughter that God blessed us with and for each and every life moment that we all experienced together.  Through the good times or the bad times, we were thankful.  

When we are thankful through the difficult times, we are making a sacrifice that honors God.  It brings joy to the Lord.  We must look through the difficulty to be thankful for Jesus.  He is the one constant in our lives.  He always loves us. He never changes.  He is always there.  There will always be storms or seasons in life when it is difficult.  I know that I am going through one of those seasons.  It is important to remember that I still have to be thankful for the air that I breathe, the people that God continually puts in my life to encourage me, the daughter that I have been blessed to raise, and that God loves me.  While it is still hard for me to see why God felt Mike’s work on earth was finished, I am thankful that I see ways that it is still continuing.  

There is a little part of a song from the Veggietales bible animated cartoons that says this:

Because a thankful heart is a happy heart!

I'm glad for what I have, that's an easy way to start!

For the love that He shares as He listens to my prayers

That's why I say thanks everyday!

I will continue to say thanks everyday because that is how God would want me to live my life.  As you go through this season, be sure that you are thankful and always make that sacrifice to honor God.  See the ways that he has blessed you.  Don’t let the circumstances in your life make your eyes to foggy to see the things that God is doing for you each and every day.  Also, don’t let negativity prevent you from allowing others to bless you.

 In the words of Philippians 1:3-4 “I thank my God every time I remember you. In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”

Do you believe?

Writing is good therapy for me. It is helping me get through this time in my life.  The following is something I wrote right after I lost Mike on October 7.

This last week has been like a nightmare that I really wish I could wake up from and tell Mike how horrible it was.  Our lives have permanently changed in a way that I never expected.  The love and help that I have received from the church family has been so strong.

My family and Mike’s family have been so wonderful for me but I have also learned that I have a much greater family in the community.  Mike would have never realized the legacy that he left.  He just liked preaching, teaching and sharing God with people through missions.  He taught me so much too.  The one thing that has stuck with me is that we never know when our time is finished and when we will face God.  What we do know is that our lives need to reflect God in all that we do.  The last movie that we watched together as a church was, “Do You Believe?”  We wached it just three days before he left this world.  It was the story of 12 people who each had different encounters.  They were all intertwined by God.  It is funny how that happens.  God is our common denominator.  He is the one that brings us all together.  We all have the choice to follow Him.  He doesn’t force us to do that.  He gives us the choice.  So many people go through hard times, tragic times, times when they may get mad at God because they feel like they received something that wasn’t fair.  I understand now.  It wasn’t fair for Mike to be taken from me leaving me to raise Hannah alone.  I know that Mike is in heaven because he made the choice to BELIEVE – Believe in God.  We will see him one day because I know that I have made that choice to believe too.  When you ask forgiveness of your sins and believe that Jesus took them all away, God promises to save a place for you in heaven.  It doesn’t mean I am perfect and doesn’t mean I will not miss him because I will.  Hannah and I will be thankful for the time we had with him and know that his legacy will continue in us.  “I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.”  Phil. 4:13.

Trials will come--how will you handle them?

I was thankful when October was over and November began. October brought much sadness and trials to our family.  It ended with Hannah getting hurt while at cheer practice as she fell from a cheer stunt onto her knee.  It was a minor injury and she will heal quickly.  However, it just was another thing in October that was another trial to face.

When trials come, we are faced with options on how we can handle it.  We can cry, get angry, shut down, get alone, or give up.  Our first option should be to turn to God but one of the previous options usually comes first or comes along with it.  Throughout the last month, I have relied on my faith in God.  I know in my heart that He is with me and that He surrounds me with people who are praying for me and for Hannah.  While we sometimes look forward to heaven and want to be there with loved ones, God has given us a purpose on Earth.  We may not know or understand what that purpose is while we are suffering through a difficult time.  I truly believe that God reveals that to you.  Sometimes we don’t see it when we are in the midst of the trial but when we focus on God, he promises that He will guide us.  Mike mentioned in a recent reminder that just checking your Bible app or your “verse of the day” is not enough.  It is important to interact with a body of believers as well as read God’s word each day.  Pray and ask God during that trial or difficult time to reveal to you your purpose.  He will do that in His own time.  Romans 8:18 says “I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.”

Mike always referred to the words of the hymn, “Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus.”  The lyrics say:  “The things of this earth will grow strangely dim in the light of his glory and grace.”  I can almost hear Mike quote those words because he did so recently.   The sufferings that we face are so minimal compared to the glory that we will one day see. This was the glory that Mike saw immediately and is walking in each and every day.  

This past fall, Hannah and I watched the movie, "God’s Not Dead.”  It is a great movie and one thing that I got from the movie was that pain and suffering from a broken relationship, sick loved one, or family troubles are temporary compared to the joy that God wants us to have.  We must live our lives to show that God is alive in all that we do and our purpose is to share that with everyone.

There is a song called “God of this City."  Some of the lyrics are:

Greater things have yet to come

And greater things are still to be done in this city

Greater things have yet to come

And greater things are still to be done here

God is not finished with me.  He is not finished with Hannah.  He is certainly not finished with MHBC and this community.  Psalms 30:5 says, “Weeping may endure for a night, but the joy comes in the morning.”  I definitely weep a lot lately.  I know it is normal because I miss the man I loved so much. People say that I am strong but I feel weak.  It is the strength of God that is coming through because I do not have it on my own. I keep getting up the next day and going on because I know that I have a purpose.  Regardless of the trial that you are going through, God has a purpose for you.  Give Him that chance to lovingly reveal it to you.

 

A Good Season

It is nice to live in a place where you experience all four seasons.  I could live without much winter because I don't like being cold but it is still fun to have a snow day!  My favorite seasons are spring and summer because I love seeing everything bloom and grow.

We can also have seasons of life.  Some seasons we wish we could live without.  It is during those times that we have learned how to grow stronger like the roots of a little sapling that is planted.  We went through what I would call a long winter, not the weather kind, but the kind that brought a lot of not-so-happy times and difficult times.  We had to learn to forgive people and rely on others.  Throughout it all, God held us and helped us be strong.  

Now we are at a good season, one where we can see the blooms and where we can see how we have grown.  Our daughter is flourishing and having a good third grade year.  Her young author book won at the school level, district level and went to the regional level.  She did an art project that advanced to be judged at a state level.  She is on a great cheer team that has taken 1st place at each event, except for one where almost the whole team got the yucky stomach flu.  We are in a wonderful church that is so loving and encouraging to us.  They truly love each other and desire to share the love of God.  It is a good season.  

Seasons of Life

We all have seasons of life. Some are short and some are long. Some may be happy and some we wish would pass quickly. What the seasons teach us is that you can prepare for some things and be ready to handle whatever comes.

Winter comes, whether I like it or not.  That is how it is with life.  The rough times may come but how we deal with it reflects to others.  Do you sit around and mope about it or do you get up, get going and appreciate the change and the hope of a new season?  I like to have the hope that even though a bump might come in the road, that hope for spring is right around the corner.

Spring is like God's little surprise party.  Things start popping up out of the ground.  Sometimes you might not remember they were there.  It is also a time to plant new seeds for things to bloom later.  How many times during our seasons of life do we plant seeds?  Sometimes we see them bloom and sometimes they don't.  Our children are only young once.  I try to be careful about the things I teach our daughter.  I want her to grow up to be a nice young lady who is conscious of her values and to love others.  Sometimes it is hard to protect her from outside elements while she grows.  All we can do sometimes is cultivate.

Summer is one of my favorite seasons.  What I don't like about summer is weeds!  Weeds seem to pop up so easily and can be hard to get rid of.  Weeds are always strong and can seem to take root and hold on tight.  During seasons of life, we must not let "weeds" take hold of our lives.  These can be anything from bad habits, negative people, or poor attitudes.  What I like to see in summer is the way the flowers can burst with color.  We should allow positive actions, people, and good attitudes to be that burst of color.

Fall is when we usually prepare our yards for the winter.  It is also a time when the leaves change colors.  We can also use this time to look back on the year and see what we could change for the better or what we can learn from the past several months.  It is also a time to reflect on how God can change us and help us to be an example of the beauty He wants us to share.

Whew...keeping up!

Keeping up with this was certainly hard. I thought it would be an easy way to encourage others and keep myself sane. So much happened in a year's time and I keep saying I will write a book about it. Maybe I will, too. It seems like life gets so busy sometimes. Do I take the time to enjoy it and take in each day like a cleansing breath? Sometimes I find myself in so many projects that I wonder how I will keep up. I am thankful for so many things and am grateful for the opportunities that come my way. Balancing it all is the key.